What does Eliphaz's approach in Job 4:2 teach about giving counsel? Setting the scene Job sits in devastating loss and physical pain (Job 1–3). His three friends have mourned with him seven silent days. Now Eliphaz breaks the silence. Eliphaz’s opening words: caution and concern “ ‘If one ventures a word with you, will you become impatient? Yet who can keep from speaking?’ ” (Job 4:2) Lessons on the tone of counsel • Begin with deference: Eliphaz asks permission, recognizing Job’s fragile state. • Express genuine concern: “who can keep from speaking?” shows heartfelt burden, not cold lecture (cf. Proverbs 25:11). • Speak gently: softness tempers hard truths (Proverbs 15:1). • Watch for offense: he anticipates Job’s possible impatience and braces for it. Lessons on the timing of counsel • Wait for the right moment: seven days of silence (Job 2:13) illustrate James 1:19—“be quick to listen, slow to speak.” • Gauge readiness: asking first allows the sufferer to accept or delay further talk. • Restrain urgency: even needed words lose effect if offered too soon (Proverbs 18:13). Lessons on the content of counsel • Sincerity is not enough: Eliphaz’s later arguments misread Job’s situation (Job 4–5; 15; 22). Sound theology must accompany kind delivery (2 Timothy 2:15). • Base counsel on solid revelation, not assumptions about hidden sin (Job 42:7). • Speak “truth in love” (Ephesians 4:15). Love without truth misleads; truth without love wounds. Putting it into practice 1. Pray and examine Scripture first (2 Timothy 3:16). 2. Listen thoroughly before responding. 3. Ask permission to speak; respect a hurting person’s limits. 4. Offer words humbly, gently, and briefly. 5. Anchor advice in clear biblical truth, avoiding speculation. 6. Stay teachable—ready to retract or amend if later shown wrong (Proverbs 9:9). |
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