What steps can we take to value honest feedback from loved ones? Faithful Wounds: God’s Perspective on Honest Feedback “Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but deceitful are the kisses of an enemy.” (Proverbs 27:6) Step One: Recognize the Loving Source • A true friend risks your momentary discomfort for your lasting good (Ephesians 4:15). • Seeing correction as an act of love turns a “wound” into a gift. Step Two: Pray for Humility Before You Respond • “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” (James 4:6) • Ask the Lord to soften your heart so you can hear without defensiveness. Step Three: Listen All the Way Through • “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger.” (James 1:19) • Let the other person finish; resist rehearsing rebuttals in your mind. Step Four: Test the Feedback by Scripture • “He who listens to life-giving reproof will dwell among the wise.” (Proverbs 15:31) • Measure the comment against biblical truths rather than personal feelings. Step Five: Thank the Messenger • Gratitude affirms their courage and keeps the channel open. • “Listen to counsel and accept discipline, that you may be wise in your latter days.” (Proverbs 19:20) Step Six: Repent and Adjust Quickly • Where Scripture confirms the critique, change course without delay (Proverbs 12:1). • Small, timely corrections prevent larger falls later. Step Seven: Seek Accountability • Invite the same loved one—or another mature believer—to check on your progress. • “Brothers, if someone is caught in a trespass, you who are spiritual should restore him with a spirit of gentleness.” (Galatians 6:1) Step Eight: Expect Fruit After the Sting • “No discipline seems enjoyable at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it yields a harvest of righteousness and peace.” (Hebrews 12:11) • Keep your eyes on the harvest, not the brief hurt. Step Nine: Become a Faithful Friend in Return • Offer truth with the same gentleness and courage you appreciate (Proverbs 9:8; Ephesians 4:15). • Mutual honesty strengthens the whole body of Christ (1 Thessalonians 5:11). |
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