How does 'own cistern' fit with polygamy?
Proverbs 5:15–17: How does the “drink from your own cistern” analogy reconcile with the fact that polygamy was practiced in biblical times?

I. Introduction to the Analogy in Proverbs 5:15–17

Proverbs 5:15–17 reads, “Drink water from your own cistern, and running water from your own well. Why should your springs flow in the streets, your streams of water in the public squares? Let them be yours alone, never to be shared with strangers.” This passage conveys a vivid picture of faithfulness within marriage. It uses the imagery of a cistern or well—important and precious sources of water in the ancient Near East—to represent the exclusivity and sanctity of the marital covenant. This invitation to remain true to one’s spouse stands alongside the knowledge that polygamy existed in certain eras of biblical history. Understanding how the biblical text consistently affirms marital fidelity, even when polygamy was practiced, is key to reconciling these concepts.


II. Overview of the Passage’s Context

1. Fatherly Counsel

Proverbs 5 is framed as wise counsel from a father to a son, addressing the danger of adultery and the beauty of a faithful marital bond. The paternal tone sets the stage for a practical portrayal of marriage as a centerpiece for moral and spiritual well-being. The analogy underscores how devotion to one’s spouse is as vital as water’s life-sustaining properties.

2. The Symbolism of Water

Water in the ancient world was scarce and often guarded. Wells, springs, and cisterns were carefully maintained since water determined survival. By linking marital fidelity to a carefully protected water source, the text highlights the precious and exclusive nature of the marriage relationship.

3. Moral and Ethical Emphasis

The imperative “drink from your own cistern” points to an ethical and moral expectation of faithfulness. Rather than permitting or endorsing extramarital relationships, the passage warns against spreading one’s “springs” among strangers. This theme of exclusivity connects directly to the ideal embodiment of “one-flesh” union found in the scriptural narrative.


III. Polygamy in the Old Testament

1. Cultural and Historical Background

Several Old Testament figures are noted for having multiple wives—Abraham, Jacob, David, and Solomon being prominent examples. This practice often reflected cultural norms of the surrounding ancient Near Eastern societies, for reasons such as alliances, lineage, protection of widows, and ensuring heirs.

2. Biblical Regulation, Not Endorsement

While the Old Testament includes laws to regulate polygamy (e.g., Exodus 21:10; Deuteronomy 21:15–17), these laws were aimed at mitigating potential harm, not celebrating the practice. Much like other societal norms of the time, polygamy was controlled to ensure protection for wives and children rather than outright endorsed as an ideal.

3. Signs of Problematic Outcomes

Throughout the narratives, polygamy often resulted in strife and conflict. Passages like 1 Kings 11:1–4 record how Solomon’s many wives led his heart astray. Genesis 16:4–5 depicts the tension between Hagar and Sarah. These accounts highlight the difficulties stemming from diverting from a monogamous ideal.


IV. The Creation Design and Monogamy

1. Foundational Blueprint

Genesis 2:24 says, “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.” This foundational model is monogamous, reflecting a purposeful and intimate union of one man and one woman. Polygamy, while it appears historically, regularly shows a departure from the original creation pattern.

2. Prophetic and New Testament Consistency

Prophets frequently speak against the idolatrous and unfaithful behavior of Israel using the metaphor of a damaged marriage (e.g., Hosea’s marriage narrative). In the New Testament, passages such as Matthew 19:4–6 reaffirm the “two becoming one flesh” paradigm. Likewise, Paul’s instruction in 1 Timothy 3:2 that an overseer be “the husband of but one wife” upholds the same principle.


V. Reconciling the Proverbial Command with Polygamy

1. Emphasis on Faithfulness Over Cultural Practices

Proverbs 5:15–17 calls for marital fidelity, presented as the standard to strive for. Despite polygamy’s occurrence, the wisdom tradition emphasizes loyalty and exclusivity, echoing the creation intent found in Genesis. The presence of polygamy in biblical narratives demonstrates human failure and cultural concession rather than a contradiction to the ideal.

2. Progressive Revelation of God’s Ideal

Scripture shows a progressive unveiling of moral and spiritual truth. Over time, commandments and teachings clarified the importance of godly fidelity. By the era of the New Testament, the weight of teaching aligns fully with the “one flesh” concept. Ancient examples of polygamy serve as historical accounts of what occurred, not prescriptions for modern practice.

3. Practical Guardrails Against Immorality

The call to “drink from your own cistern” is a clear directive against adultery. In a cultural milieu where polygamy existed, the proverb still upholds the principle that intimacy belongs within the boundaries of a committed relationship—advising men not to stray, even if additional marriages were culturally permitted. The major thrust of wisdom literature is to safeguard holiness and well-being, rather than endorsing any multiplication of relationships.


VI. Application of the Analogy

1. Marital Faithfulness

Faithfulness is lauded throughout Scripture as a reflection of how people are to honor commitments. The image of carefully protecting water sources resonates with the protective, nurturing stance one should have toward a spouse. This mindset transcends cultural norms and remains central to marital ethics.

2. Integrity of Character

Consistently, biblical wisdom associates integrity with honoring promises—including marital vows. The text underlines that straying outside the marriage bond carries harmful consequences, similar to letting precious water be wasted in the streets. Such imagery drives home the costliness of unfaithfulness.

3. Covenant as Illustration of Divine Faithfulness

In many biblical passages, marriage symbolizes God’s covenant relationship with His people. Just as God remains faithful, so are spouses called to remain faithful. Even amid historical practices, Scripture aims to guide believers toward a higher standard that reflects the steadfastness and purity of divine love.


VII. Conclusion

Proverbs 5:15–17 powerfully communicates the call to fidelity within marriage through the image of water drawn from one’s own cistern. Although polygamy appears in the historical records of the Old Testament, the broader scriptural witness—from the creation account to the wisdom literature and beyond—consistently affirms a monogamous design.

The passage’s analogy emphasizes loyalty and the sanctity of the marriage covenant, aligning with the original design of one man and one woman united in a lifelong bond. Even as polygamy existed under certain circumstances in ancient cultures, biblical teaching consistently underscores faithfulness, reflecting a moral and spiritual ideal that highlights God’s covenantal love. Therefore, the “drink from your own cistern” imagery stands as a timeless exhortation: guard the sanctity of the marriage relationship, live in faithfulness, and be mindful that such exclusivity brings blessing, wholeness, and honor to God.

Why blame only the woman in Proverbs 5:8?
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