How can Song of Solomon 7:4 encourage us to honor our spouse today?

The verse in focus

“Your neck is like a tower of ivory; your eyes are the pools in Heshbon by the gate of Bath-rabbim; your nose is like the tower of Lebanon facing toward Damascus.” (Songs 7:4)

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What the imagery tells us

• Tower of ivory – strength blended with beauty; costly, enduring, refined

• Pools in Heshbon – deep, clear, restful; inviting reflection, not turbulence

• Tower of Lebanon – watchful protection, oriented outward, offering security

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Honoring through our words

• Speak specifically: the groom names features that matter to him; imitate this by praising traits unique to your spouse (Proverbs 31:28).

• Speak respectfully: comparison to ivory and towers elevates, never demeans (Ephesians 4:29).

• Speak consistently: the verse sits in a steady flow of admiration; make affirmation habitual, not occasional.

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Honoring through attentive observation

• Notice the details: eyes “by the gate” suggest the lover has studied her closely; take time to learn what delights and burdens your spouse.

• Value inner depth: “pools” hint at clarity beneath the surface; honor feelings, thoughts, and dreams, not just outward duties (1 Peter 3:7).

• Celebrate strength: towers symbolize reliability; acknowledge your spouse’s steadfast qualities with gratitude.

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Honoring through protection and security

• A tower faces threats; bring prayer, wise counsel, and practical safeguards that make your spouse feel safe (Ephesians 5:28-29).

• Stand watch over your marriage: guard schedules, habits, and relationships that could erode intimacy.

• Offer emotional refuge: be the first place your spouse turns when storms come.

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Practical steps for today

• Send a personal message highlighting one admired trait—be concrete and sincere.

• Plan an evening where you simply listen, allowing your spouse to share heart-level thoughts without interruption.

• Identify one way to shoulder a responsibility that normally rests on your spouse, demonstrating protective love.

• Pray privately for your spouse’s safety and flourishing, then let them know you did.

When the imagery of Songs 7:4 saturates our minds, honoring our spouse becomes natural: we speak life, observe with affectionate attention, and provide steadfast security, reflecting the covenant love God designed for marriage.