What steps can we take to align our marriages with biblical teachings in Matthew 19? Grounding the Discussion: Matthew 19:7 “ ‘Why then,’ they asked, ‘did Moses order a man to give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?’ ” Recognizing the Heart Issue Behind Divorce • Jesus answers in vv. 8-9 that Moses permitted divorce “because of your hardness of heart,” making clear that the root problem is spiritual, not procedural. • Aligning marriage with Scripture therefore begins with softened, repentant hearts (Ezekiel 36:26). Rooted in Creation: God’s Design for Lifelong Union • Jesus points back to Genesis 2:24: “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” • God established marriage as a permanent, one-flesh covenant, not a contract to be dissolved at convenience (Malachi 2:16). Guarding Against Hardness of Heart Practical actions that cultivate tenderness and prevent the drift toward divorce: • Daily confession of sin—individually and together (1 John 1:9). • Quick forgiveness, refusing to keep a record of wrongs (1 Corinthians 13:5-6). • Regular time in Scripture and prayer as a couple (Psalm 119:11). • Humble listening before speaking (James 1:19), promoting understanding rather than defensiveness. Embracing Covenant Faithfulness • Honor the vows made before God and witnesses; let “Yes” be yes (Matthew 5:37). • See marriage as a picture of Christ and the church (Ephesians 5:25-32); sacrificial love is the model, not self-interest. • Pursue unity in decisions, finances, parenting, and sexual intimacy (1 Corinthians 7:3-5). Elevating God’s Word Above Cultural Permissions • Culture may normalize easy divorce; Jesus restores the Creator’s standard. • Choose obedience even when civil law allows more permissive options (Acts 5:29). • Seek godly counsel when conflicts arise (Proverbs 11:14), not merely legal advice. Cultivating a Lifestyle of Repentance and Renewal • Schedule regular check-ins to address unresolved issues before they calcify into bitterness (Hebrews 12:15). • Celebrate milestones and answered prayers to reinforce gratitude. • Serve together in ministry; shared mission deepens partnership (Philippians 2:2). Living Out Love in Action Practical steps for everyday alignment with Matthew 19: 1. Speak words that build up, avoiding contempt or sarcasm (Ephesians 4:29). 2. Practice mutual submission—seeking one another’s best (Ephesians 5:21). 3. Date your spouse; intentional time guards affection (Proverbs 5:18-19). 4. Guard purity—refuse pornography or emotional affairs (Job 31:1; Matthew 5:28). 5. Invite accountability from mature believers who will point you back to Scripture (Galatians 6:1-2). Encouragement from Related Passages • Colossians 3:14: “And over all these virtues put on love, which is the bond of perfect unity.” • Romans 12:10: “Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Outdo yourselves in honoring one another.” • 1 Peter 4:8: “Above all, love one another deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.” Conclusion: Walking in Covenant Loyalty Aligning marriage with Matthew 19 means rejecting hardness of heart and embracing God’s original, lifelong design. By treasuring Scripture, practicing daily repentance, and embodying Christ-like love, couples live out a covenant that reflects the gospel to a watching world. |
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