How does Matthew 18:15 guide us in resolving conflicts within the church? The Text at the Center “ If your brother sins against you, go and confront him privately. If he listens to you, you have won your brother.” (Matthew 18:15) What the Verse Assumes • Conflict will happen even among believers. • Believers are part of the same spiritual family (“your brother”). • Reconciliation is possible and expected. The First Instruction: Go • Take initiative; don’t wait for the other person. • Avoid public airing of grievances—no gossip, no triangulation (Proverbs 16:28). • Refusing to go is disobedience to Christ’s clear command. The Second Instruction: Confront Him Privately • One‐on‐one allows honest dialogue without embarrassment. • It keeps the circle of knowledge as small as the circle of offense (Proverbs 25:9). • Privacy protects reputations and encourages openness. The Goal: Win Your Brother • “Win” implies restoration, not victory in an argument (Galatians 6:1). • Relationship is prioritized over being proved right. • The aim is mutual joy and unity (Psalm 133:1). Practical Steps for Living Out Matthew 18:15 1. Examine your own heart (Psalm 139:23–24). 2. Pray for humility and clarity. 3. Schedule a personal, face-to-face conversation as soon as reasonable. 4. Speak truthfully but gently (Ephesians 4:15). 5. Listen actively; seek to understand their perspective (James 1:19). 6. Offer forgiveness and request it where needed (Colossians 3:13). 7. Agree on concrete steps to prevent repeat offense if applicable. Why Private First? • Maintains unity by limiting collateral damage. • Demonstrates love that covers a multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8). • Creates a safe environment for repentance and confession (James 5:16). • Honors the offender’s dignity, modeling Christ’s restorative heart. When It Works • The relationship is restored, trust rebuilt. • No further steps are required (Matthew 18:16–17 are unnecessary). • The watching world sees a living testimony of the gospel’s power (John 13:35). If It Doesn’t Work • Obey the next steps in Matthew 18:16–17: add one or two witnesses, then involve the church. • Each stage escalates only enough to bring about repentance, always aiming at restoration. The Heart Behind It All • Christ loved us enough to pursue us privately on the cross before announcing our justification publicly (Romans 5:8). • Following His pattern preserves unity, displays grace, and honors God. |
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