What steps can we take to prevent "slander" and "gossip" among believers? A Sobering Reminder “For I am afraid that when I come, I may not find you as I wish, and you may not find me as you wish. I fear that there may be discord, jealousy, rage, rivalry, slander, gossip, arrogance, and disorder.” Why Slander and Gossip Must Be Stopped • They grieve the Spirit (Ephesians 4:29–30). • They wound brothers and sisters (Proverbs 18:8). • They destroy witness before the world (John 13:35). • They invite divine discipline (Matthew 12:36–37). Step 1 — Start With the Heart • Paul links gossip to jealousy and arrogance; root sins must be confessed. • Psalm 139:23–24: invite God to search hidden motives. • James 3:14–16 warns that bitter envy produces “every evil practice.” Step 2 — Guard the Gate of Your Mouth • Proverbs 13:3: “He who guards his lips preserves his life.” • Ask three quick questions before speaking: – Is it true? – Is it necessary? – Is it loving? • If any answer is “no,” remain silent (Proverbs 17:27–28). Step 3 — Speak What Builds • Ephesians 4:29: “Let no unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building up…” • Replace destructive words with edifying ones: encouragement, Scripture, thanksgiving. Step 4 — Go to the Person, Not Around Them • Matthew 18:15: private, loving confrontation prevents rumor mills. • Proverbs 25:9–10 urges settling matters directly to avoid disgrace. Step 5 — Cultivate an Atmosphere of Grace • Colossians 4:6: words “always…seasoned with salt.” • Titus 3:2: “to slander no one, to be peaceable, gentle, showing true humility toward all men.” Step 6 — Establish Accountable Relationships • Ecclesiastes 4:9–10: two are better than one. • Invite trusted believers to correct you when speech strays. Step 7 — Keep Christ at the Center • Luke 6:45: mouths reveal hearts; fill the heart with Christ’s words. • Hebrews 12:2: fixing eyes on Jesus purifies motives and conversation. Step 8 — Pray Daily for a Tamed Tongue • Psalm 141:3: “Set a guard, O LORD, over my mouth; keep watch at the door of my lips.” • James 1:26: true religion bridles the tongue; ask God for ongoing help. Summary Checklist ✓ Confess jealousy, pride, or hurt feelings. ✓ Pause and examine speech by truth, necessity, and love. ✓ Replace gossip with encouragement. ✓ Address issues directly with those involved. ✓ Foster grace-filled, accountable fellowship. ✓ Focus continually on Christ and seek His enabling power. |
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