What does the Bible say about self-love?

1. The Context and Modern Understanding of “Self-Love”

Modern discussions about self-love often emphasize self-esteem, personal fulfillment, and emotional well-being. While popular culture may present this as purely self-focused affirmation, Scripture offers a richer and more nuanced perspective. Rather than centering on pride or vanity, biblical teaching points toward a healthy sense of one’s worth rooted in being created by an eternal God, balanced with humility and sacrificial love toward others.

2. Foundational Scriptural Principle: Love God and Love Others

In Matthew 22:37–39, Jesus says, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’” Here, the command to love others presupposes a basic, natural love for oneself. The Bible never encourages hatred of self; instead, it recognizes that people generally act in their own best interests.

When Jesus quotes Leviticus 19:18, “Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against any of your people, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the LORD,” the emphasis lies on how we extend care and compassion to others. However, this also indicates that inherent self-care is part of how we are designed.

3. Distinguishing Healthy Self-Love from Selfishness

Scripture is clear about the pitfalls of selfish love. Second Timothy 3:2 warns that in the last days, people will be “lovers of themselves,” implying excessive self-obsession that neglects God and others. Selfishness and pride are consistently condemned (Proverbs 16:18; Philippians 2:3), as they interfere with our dependence on God and the love we owe to others.

On the other hand, a healthy view of self begins with understanding that we are made in God’s image (Genesis 1:26–27). Because of this, we can recognize our inherent value and worth. Ephesians 5:29 uses the illustration of caring for one’s own body as a natural extension of daily life: “After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church.”

4. The Biblical Basis for a Healthy Self-Image

Psalm 139:14 states, “I praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” Recognizing every individual’s God-given design demolishes the notion of self-hatred or viewing one’s life as worthless. At the same time, Christianity teaches that we are fallen (Romans 3:23), in constant need of God’s grace, and we cannot solely rely on our own strength or moral goodness.

Balanced self-love in Scripture has two pillars:

• We are precious creations of God, worthy of care.

• We are also sinners in need of redemption, grounded in humility.

5. Warnings Against Excessive Focus on the Self

While Scripture acknowledges that a person naturally cares for his or her own well-being, it warns against elevating self-interest above God and others. Philippians 2:4 urges believers to “look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.” Jesus exemplified the ultimate sacrifice of putting others first (Philippians 2:5–8).

The anecdotal examples of biblical figures underscore these truths. King Saul, for instance, devolved into vanity and self-concern, ultimately rejecting God’s will to preserve personal power (1 Samuel 15). Nebuchadnezzar’s pride (Daniel 4) resulted in his humiliation until he recognized God’s sovereignty. These narratives reveal that inflated self-love ends in spiritual and often practical ruin.

6. Loving Yourself by Embracing Your Identity in Christ

Scripture teaches that believers find their true identity in Jesus Christ. Galatians 2:20 declares, “I have been crucified with Christ, and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me.” When one’s identity rests in the Lord, self-love transforms into grateful acceptance of God’s grace and design. This approach combats both vanity and self-hatred, enabling a Christ-centered perspective.

Romans 12:3 offers critical insight: “Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but think of yourself with sober judgment.” Genuine self-love does not ignore personal flaws or sin but confronts them honestly while resting in divine mercy. From this vantage, caring for oneself becomes consistent with caring for others, since it is rooted in God’s love and truth.

7. Practical Ways to Cultivate Biblical Self-Love

• Reflection on God’s Word: Regularly reading passages like Psalm 139, Ephesians 1, and Romans 8 reminds us of God’s abundant love and grace.

• Prayer and Confession: Admitting sin and receiving forgiveness leads to humility and a renewed mind (1 John 1:9), preventing prideful or despairing attitudes.

• Serving Others: Focusing on the needs of others, as Jesus instructs, fosters genuine love for oneself and one’s neighbor. This follows the pattern of Christ, who said, “It is more blessed to give than to receive” (Acts 20:35).

• Healthy Stewardship: Caring for physical, emotional, and mental health aligns with the principle that our bodies and lives are gifts from God (1 Corinthians 6:19–20).

8. Balancing the Command to Love Neighbor and Self

When the Bible says, “love your neighbor as yourself” (Matthew 22:39), it neither exalts self-obsession nor does it endorse neglecting personal well-being. It presumes that we naturally desire our own good and extends that concern outward. By loving God first and foremost, the believer’s self-love falls into proper perspective, enabling sacrificial but not destructive service to others.

9. Conclusion

From Genesis to Revelation, the Scriptures uphold the goodness of caring for oneself as part of honoring the Creator’s design—yet warned against idolizing self in any form. Biblical self-love is rooted in a deep understanding of God’s love, our inherent worth as His creations, and our need for His redemption. Rather than endorsing self-centeredness, biblical teaching guides us to love God supremely, to see ourselves through His grace, and to extend that love to others.

This balanced, Scripture-grounded approach ensures that self-love is never isolated from its true source—God’s sacrificial love—so that we remain humble, grateful, and ever mindful of His glory.